Global Financial Crisis Hitting Home

My brother just lost his job. :-( I hope he is ok and can get through this. He can get very down, feeling extremely sorry for himself. I really hope he gets a new job soon, for his sake both emotionally and financially.

Gun Shot Victim

I saw this article on the news today, and felt so much sadness for her. To have her own partner do this to her is unimaginable. It is so sad. This is one of those times when I truly believe in an-eye-for-an-eye.

Boyz n the Hood

I just watched Boyz n the Hood. 17 years since its release, but hey, better late than never. I wish I watched it 17 years ago though. It is an excellent movie, and probably was the first to tell the world the real story about what is happening in the United States in some of the black communities in that country.

It is tragic. Black kids wanting to escape but can't. This one scene where a teenage girl is trying to study, but is distracted by the constant gunfire and sirens outside. And I won't ruin the ending, but suffice to say, the effort to get out is almost always insurmountable.

I don't know what it's like in that country, but from what I've heard from people who have been there, the race segregation is still clearly visible in most states. That is very sad to see, and I really feel for those people who are portrayed in the movie. There are thousands, if not millions, of people that the movie represents, and my heart goes out to all of them. I really wish the Government could do more to help these communities. No one ever wants to be in that sort of situation, but it is all the more difficult to escape such a life if you have little to no resources (financial or otherwise) to assist you to do so.

Motherhood

Is it wrong if I have no inkling whatsoever to become a mother? Christmas time always makes me question my lack of maternal instincts. We always meet up with our family & friends at this time of year, most of whom have little kids attached to their hip (figuratively speaking, but you know what I mean). But I don't ooh & ahh over them like some women I know. Does that make me less of a woman in some way?

Then there's the guilt I feel that my parents will not be grandparents. (Not from me, anyway. My brother could be a different story.) I see their friends becoming grandparents, and I feel sad that I can't (or rather, won't) give them the same opportunity. It brings tears to my eyes. I would LOVE my parents to become grandparents, I just don't want to be the mother of the kids. LOL

And why don't I have any desire to become a mother anyway? Shouldn't it be something innate in all women? I feel like I'm wired incorrectly or something. I know I'm not (wired incorrectly), but sometimes I wonder why I feel the way that I do...

Georgia Rule

Georgia (to Rachel): For a smart girl, you do stupid well.

LOL - B thinks this is so perfect for me, and I totally agree!

Update from the slacker (aka me)

I've been rather slack over the last few months. I've been really busy (who isn't, I know, so poor excuse, I know also), with work, study, and dancing keeping me busy seven days a week.

Surprise surprise, I didn't even make it to the interview stage for the 2009 intake for medicine. I was half expecting the "thanks, but no thanks" letter from them, and unfortunately, I got it. In the form of an email, but the message is still the same. :(

And to tell you the truth, I'm not all that disappointed. I've been doing a lot of soul-searching over the last few months, trying to figure out what it is that I really truly would love to do, and medicine just didn't seem to fit it. I don't think I would get the enjoyment from seeing patient after patient, day in day out, solving their health problems. I may enjoy the relationship building aspect of it, but I'm not much of a hands on person, and that goes hand in hand (more or less) with this career.

What I have come to the conclusion about though is what I really want to do: and that is to work with numbers, spreadsheets, data. But not in finance, as investments and profits of businesses do not interest me in the slightest. I NEVER voluntarily pick up the Australian Financial Review to read for pleasure (also mentioned in my previous post, not surprisingly). I need to work where I can put to better use my highly numerical abilities in a different field.

And I think a scientific field would suit me much better. Psychology, perhaps, or assist in medical studies. Somewhere where I still get to work with data, but in a field that interests me personally.

I have to continue to do my research on how to best move across in to this non-financial arena. But I'm so happy that I've come this far and narrowed down exactly what it is that really gives me that buzz that I've been lacking in my working life so far.

Finance is soooo not for me

Helping out at Lowes' store recently has put a bit more perspective on my life. I've decided that I enjoy being out of an office environment. I like working on the customer service side of things, as well as working on administrative details. I've always known that my passion never was in finance, and unfortunately have spent a good decade of my life in it. I love helping people, and I would much rather do that than read the Australian Financial Review every day. Ugh. I can't even bear to think about reading it, let alone actually read the damn thing.

Although I may just be enjoying it because it's not my usual daily routine. Would I still feel the same way if it was actually my job to work at the store, day in day out?

I've been thinking about what I'll do if I don't get in to medicine this year (especially given my terribly disorganised approach to the application process this year - please see previous post). Would I want to do something else still related to the health care field? How about nursing? Could I still be fulfilled in a nursing role? What else can I do? Can I do something where I can still use some of my current skills but in a non-finance field?

My current chosen career was decided based on external factors, and not on what I'm truly passionate about. And I truly regret that. Unfortunately though, I don't know what it is that I'm truly passionate about, so at the moment I feel a lack of direction. Will I ever know, I wonder.